*this post may not be suitable for children under the age 15. Or for my parents. Sorry.
So today I went to the movies with mes amies, Emily and Amy. Hello, Utopia plays movies at noon every single day for only 3.50 euros! And since I'm all ballin' it right now I'm like hey girl hey hollahhhhh to going and spending those precious E's for some screen time. So yeah, yesterday I saw a British movie (which totally p'ed me off**) and today I saw the French film, Un baiser, s’il vous plait.
My understanding of the title? "A f***, please."
Sounded intriguing enough.
But, um, I was totally wrong. And, thus, I spent the entire film totally confused. All the way till the very end. All the way till when Amy and I were walking home for spaghetti and I was explaining how I didn't understand what happened en fin and she explained that "un baiser" is a kiss. Not a f***. OOOOOOOOOOOOH. So now the whole movie makes sense. And I want to re-watch it. But I feel too dumb.
So yeah. I was so proud of myself for getting through a French movie whose plot I (mostly) understood, whose dialogue I could decipher but then... yeah... BIG difference in the definition of baiser and my understanding of it.
**The film from yesterday? The British one? Death at a Funeral, that's its name. Ok the idea is that all these people with all these different stories get together at one funeral for an old guy. His sons throw the funeral, his widow is there, the whole town is there... The sons are strapped for cash, one woman shows up with her fiance high on hallucinogens, etc. etc. The whole premise? The one son, who pays for the funeral, is blackmailed by a guy who used to be the dead guy's lover. As in, if they don't pay up, said-guy will announce the homosexual affair to all those at the funeral and include in his announcement, a picture slide show of himself with his lover in rather compromising positions. Oh no! What are they to do! They don't have much money! But they bust out the checkbook immediately and chaos ensues.
I have so many problems with this. So many that I ended up shutting my eyes for some of the movie because I was so annoyed.
1) Lover of dead guy (ok, just to make it easier for the story-telling: he's a midget. So I will call him M) blackmails the two sons for 15,000 pounds. Why is it that M's blackmailing is almost a sure-deal? Because he's gay? Because the two sons don't want anyone to find out that their father was having a homosexual affair? Um yeah. The fact that it's a gay affair is more shocking, therefore more horrifying to the sons and they start writing the check. Would it have been as urgent to write the check if the affair had been a heterosexual one? I think not. Not at all. Grrrrrrrrr.
2) Why the hell is the gay lover using his relationship as blackmail anyway? What does that say to his relationship? I mean, basically this says that M isn't the best guy but it also doesn't do anything for the way gay relationships are shown in the media.
So yeah, I was really really frustrated with the movie. I will probably delete all this commentary in a few minutes but for now I'll put it out there.
Ooh, I will give the movie this: high naked guy on a roof is a pretty funny idea.
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I actually knew that! People sign letters "Grosses bises," right?
That + "Je m'appelle" = the only French I remember.
You will have to talk for me the whole time I'm visiting you. Except when we're in Germany. Then we will be silent film stars.
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